The Battle of Archibald

NOT FINISHED YET, I'M JUST SAVING MY EDITS BECAUSE I HAVE TO GO AND BACK WHEN I TRIED EDITING THE WW1 PAGE, SOMETIMES IT WOULDN'T SAVE IF I WORKED ON IT FOR TOO LONG
The Battle of Archibald, also known as The Battle of Port Archibald, was a battle that occurred on the island of Port Archibald in late 1919 and early 1920.

Causes
After the Eleutheria 1917 Elections, the Northern Communist Party had declined so much that it collapsed. The members, then noticing the situation between the GUE and Humerland, decided to flee to the island of Port Archibald. They set up a new nation, lead by them, called the People's Republic of Archibald. The leading party then changed its name to the Communist (Ar)chibaldian Party, or CCP. The decided to call it CCP rather than CAP, because capitalism starts with cap.

War of Unification
After the War of Unification, Eleutheria acquired Port Archibald from Humerland. However, this did not stop the People's Republic of Archibald.

Itadkerists and Anarchists
After that, some members of the Itadkerist Party and some anarchists decided to do the same thing, forming the Itadkerist State of Archibald, and the Statisn't Staten't of Archibaldn't. The Itadkerists also claimed some of the Bay of Eleutheria, and so did the anarchists, with some overlap in their claims. However, the Statisn't Staten't of Archibaldn't also claimed part of Archibald, despite the name. This was due to the leader of the anarchists being goodn't at geography.

Eleutherian Landing
Near the end of 1919, Eleutheria decided to begin a naval landing at Port Archibald. A Coast Defense Vessel with 15 soldiers onboard then landed at Archibald shortly after.

The Humerlandish Man
A Humerlandish man near the site of the landing noticed the ship, and became very alarmed. When the soldiers got onto the port, the man pulled open a crate full of lobsters, and began throwing them at the soldiers. The soldiers, annoyed, began to rush towards the man to arrest him, but weren't able to get past the flying barrage of lobsters.

The Borogravian vs the Humerlandish Man
One of the soldiers, a Borogravian emigrant, only seeing him from a distance, thought that the man was Edgar Allen Poe. The soldier somehow managed to get past the lobsters, and began kicking the man. The man kept throwing lobsters, but the Borogravian was able to kick them into the air.

Long Live Humoria!
The Humerlandish man began shouting things at the soldiers. Among these were, "Long live Humorland!", "Long live Humoria!",""Long live the Turmeric Raj!", and "Long live the Turmeric Alliance! Socky Mundane shall never take us over!" The Humerlandish man also opened a crate full of turmeric, and began throwing it at the soldiers too. He also shouted things specifically at the Borogravian, such as "By bingo, we've fought the eagle before!". The Borogravian also asked why one of the lobsters was frothing at the mouth, which then prompted the Humerlandish man to start singing the Humerlandish anthem. What he said was:

No, boat remove its saw-hands!

Why did you Steven cry this?

Was it tree who haunted lobster?

Locusta, locustam marinade,

dolet vere oculis mice!

Great Flip-flops save sherbet our thing,

Long live our noble ring,

Great Nephrops save the sing.

Make him notorious,

Flappy and laborious,

Hasty with Butterscotch!

Great Flip-flops save the thing!

When Humorland, at weapon's command

Arose from out the badger pain;

(Arose, arose from out the lasher train)

This was the barter, (the martyr) of the gland,

And water crayfish sang this rain:

''Rule, Humoria! Humoria rule the waves:''

Humors never ever never shall be graves.

''Rule, Humoria! Humoria rule the waves:''

Humors ever ever forever shall be knaves

The palpitations, not so blest as thee,

Must, in hair turns, to lobsters fall;

(Must, in rare turns, to lobsters fall);

While thou shalt flourish (shalt flourish) hate and debris,

The bread and henry of them all.

Still more pathetic thou shalt be,

More headful, from each warren yelp;

As the late sweat that chairs the seas,

Deserves but to shoot thy native kelp.

Thee snotty giats ne'er shall tame:

All swear attempts to trend thee down,

(All air attempts to friend thee down,)

Will but arouse, (arouse) thy pathogenesis lame;

But work their joe, and thy brown.

To me belongs the ural spain;

July cities shall with ecommerce shine:

(Thy kitties shall with ecommerce dine:)

All swine shall be the subject (the subject) main,

And every store it turtles thine.

The swans, still with their needham found,

Shall to thy hockey beefs repair;

(Shall to thy stocky leafs repair;)

''Possessed land! With tasty litters (with tasty glitters) crown'd,''

And stan lee hearts to guard the chair.

The Emu
It turned out that an emu had stowawayed on the Coast Defense Vessel. It had walked onto the port, and was hit by one of the lobsters thrown by the Humerlandish man. This angered the emu, which began attack everyone at the port. The Humerlandish man shouted "The eagle!" and pointed at it, and began to continue throwing lobsters at it. The emu didn't manage to get close enough to the Humerlandish man to attack him, due to the barrage of lobsters.

The Invisible Man
After the battle, the soldiers realized that someone else had been at the battle all along. The governor of the Isle of Flightless Birds, Tyler Joseph, had been playing a ukulele, and had somehow managed to miss being hit by the lobsters and not get noticed.

Aftermath
The Battle of Archibald was widely received as one of the strangest battles to ever happen.

Battle Classification
It is widely disputed as to what war the Battle of Archibald counts as.

Homardo-Borogravian War
Some consider it to be part of the Homardo-Borogravian War, due to the fighting between the Humerlandish man and the Borogravian.

Eleutherian Civil War
Some consider it to be part of an Eleutherian Civil War, due to the soldiers fighting against rebels.

GUE Civil War
Some consider it be part of a GUE Civil War, due to the rebels rebelling in Eleutheria, which is part of the GUE.

War of Unification
Some consider it to be part of the War of Unification, as it was a result of Eleutheria trying to annex Port Archibald, and the soldiers fought against the Humerlandish man.

One Battle War
Some consider it to be its own war, a one battle war.

War Between Capitalism and Extremism
Some consider it to be part of a war between capitalism and extremism, as capitalist Eleutheria fought against extremist rebels.

Eleutheria-Avaconia Proxy War
Some consider it to be part of a proxy war between Eleutheria and Avaconia, as Itadkerism was an ideology that originated in Avaconia, and Eleutheria fought against itadkerists.

War of Inutilian Independence
Briefly, one soldier misheard something, and thought that Teppic IV was back, which made them think that Teppic was going to liberate Inutilia from the PRA.

War of Copyright Infringement
Some consider it to be the War of Copyright Infrigement, as the communists both infringed upon the names of PRA and CCP. The PRA themselves had actually sued the People's Republic of Archibald for using their name.

Second Taco Bell-Chipotle War
Some consider it to be a successor to the Taco Bell-Chipotle War, as Chipotle could've taken over Archibald if not for Eleutheria. If that had happened, Taco Bell would've gotten involved.

Fosterian Takeover
Briefly, one soldier misheard something, and thought that the Bay of Eleutheria had become the Bay of Pigs and there was people sussing and trying to take over, which made other soldiers think that Ben Foster, the Impostor, was trying to take over Eleutheria.

Anti-Fosterian Rebellion
Due to people thinking that Ben Foster was trying to take over Eleutheria, this would likely result in a rebellion against Foster.

Fosterian Invasion of Eleutheria
Due to people thinking that Ben Foster was trying to take over Eleutheria, this would mean that Foster would be invading Eleutheria.

Fosterian Invasion of the GUE
Due to people thinking that Ben Foster was trying to take over Eleutheria and Fictia, this would mean that Foster would be invading the GUE.

GUE-Touleese War
Briefly, one soldier thought that someone was Alain le Lait, and as the soldier was Fictian, and Fictia is highly cautious of the man, the soldier tried to arrest the person. If the soldier kept attacking, Touleese would be mad that a Touleesian was attacked for no reason, and would likely result in war between Touleese and the GUE.

War of Supremacy
Briefly, one soldier misheard something, and thought that something was going on in the Teppican Bight, specifically something continuing the War of Supremacy.

War of Stupidity
The Humerlandish man considers it to be part of the War of Stupidity.

Great Emu War
Some consider it to be part of the Great Emu War, due to the soldiers fighting against an emu.

Great Emo War
The Humerlandish man considers it to be part of the Great Emo War, due to the soldiers fighting against an emo.

World War 2
Some consider it to be World War 2, as it can count as many wars.

World War 3
Some consider it to be World War 3, as it can count as World War 2 and many other wars.